SV stereotypes

The general public has many wrong but hardened ideas about sexualized violence, the abused person and the abuser, which may not have anything to do with reality. In other words, these are myths/stereotypes that we often reproduce in everyday life.

Myths/stereotypes prevent us from understanding what is happening around us, seeing the real picture. They contribute to justifying the abuser and provide a fertile ground for placing all the responsibility for what happened on the abused person. The specialists of the Sexual Assault Crisis Center can testify that these myths/stereotypes are false based on the cases they managed in the course of 16 years of professional activity. 

Common myths

• It is impossible to sexually abuse a woman who has not given consent.

 Often, this happens because of our flawed and incomplete understanding of the concept of “consent”. It is important to remember that consent is the full awareness of the situation and actions between the parties, the presence of mutual desire and its communication through verbal or non-verbal means.

• He/she provoked the abuser with their behavior. 

 It is important to know that going on a date, wearing short or revealing clothing, drinking alcohol, and similar activities do not mean that a person is giving a consent to having sex. Moreover, this stereotype places all the responsibility for violence on the person who has been abused.

As for cases where a minor has been sexually abused, it makes no sense to even talk about consent, although society may treat a minor the same way as an adult woman.

• If he/she resisted with all strength, they would have freed themselves from the hands of the abuser.

We often mistakenly assume that if the person subjected to sexualzed violence did not resist, then they did not mind it. There is also another approach, that if the adult person had wanted to resist, they could have avoided what happened.

Despite the popular opinion that the first reaction in such situations should be “fighting off” or “running away”, the person is often in a state of psychological “freezing” during the act of sexualized violence. In this state, one cannot perform any action (push, shout, hit, run, call for help, etc.).

Another reason for not resisting is fear for one’s life. Sexualized violence undermines one’s sense of safety and security. Due to this circumstance, a person may not resist so that the abuser does not use physical violence against them, and they “avoid an even worse” consequence, which is death.

• Sexualized violence is an uncommon crime.

Sexualized violence is latent (disguised) in nature. Often, victims of violence do not speak up about it, feeling guilty and avoiding the critical attitude of the public. There are many cases when one is subjected to violence but is not aware that what happened is sexualized violence.

• Sexualized violence only happens outside and in dark places.

Sexualized violence can be committed anywhere and at any time of the day. Since the abuser is often a person you know, the crime scene may be the abuser’s or victim’s apartment, workplace, shared rental space, car, and other places where they may be together.

• The abuser is always a stranger and cannot be a family member.

As a rule, the abuser is a person you know: a family member, colleague, partner, neighbor, family friend, etc., a person the abused person trusts.

• Perpetrators of sexual violence have mental health problems.

There are a few stereotypes in action here:

1. Persons with mental health problems and/or intellectual disability are dangerous and are likely to commit violence.
2. Sexualized violence can only be committed by persons with mental health problems and/or intellectual disability, because they have a low level of consciousness and cannot control their actions and desires.

In this way, the public tries to somehow “explain or justify” sexualized violence, because there is an opinion that “normal” people cannot commit such acts.

There may be cases where a sexual abuser has a mental health problem, but this does not mean that all abusers have it. 

• Abusers are uneducated and/or socially disadvantaged people.

This may be true in some cases, but the real picture shows that violence is also committed by highly conscious and financially secure people. In other words, the economic status and level of education are not determining factors, because the purpose of committing sexualized violence is to satisfy sexual desire, to assert power, to oppress.

• If the abused person enjoyed the sex act, it is not abuse.

Since the sex act has a physiological nature, the sex organs can be physically stimulated during the act and both male and female persons can feel sexual pleasure, which is a purely biological effect and does not cancel the act of violence. This phenomenon can be encountered in cases of sexualized violence against a minor, especially when the child is not aware of the criminal nature of the actions taken against them. 

• A woman cannot be sexually abused by her husband or partner.

Because it is common to think that sexual activity between spouses is a mandatory condition and a marital obligation, marital rape or rape by a partner is not taken seriously. It is widely considered that a woman is obliged to have sex with her husband or partner regardless of her desire. However, any sex act should be voluntary, otherwise it is an incident of sexualized violence.

Unfortunately, myths or stereotypes about sexualized violence are not limited to this. They vary, they exist in all societies, and talking about them and emphasizing their misinterpretation of reality has a crucial role in protecting against violence and avoiding revictimization of the abused person. And it is important to remember that only the abuser is guilty of sexualized violence and they must be held accountable for what happened.

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