SV and consent

Let’s talk about consent: The term “consent” has different definitions across different countries of the world and in different settings. This is what makes it so difficult to understand.

What does consent mean?

Consent is a conscious and informed agreement between partners/participants to voluntarily engage in sexual intercourse or to take any action during the intercourse. How does consent manifest itself?

In consent, the circumstances of freedom of choice and ability to make a decision are crucial. A number of factors should be considered, including:

• Age, level of consciousness
• Information about the location, purpose
• History, peculiarities of the relationship between the parties
• Role and distribution of power 
• Disability or other vulnerable condition
• Degree of use of alcohol, drugs, poisonous substances, etc.

There should be consent to every episode, and to any type of act. It is very important to discuss boundaries and expectations with your partner before engaging in any sexual activity. It implies positive, unequivocal and voluntary consent to engage in each of the clearly explained sexual acts leading to intercourse.

Consent is demonstrated by mutually understandable words and/or actions that clearly indicate a willingness to engage in sexual activity․ A clear verbal “yes” or other verbal expressions speak of free choice. Thus, silence cannot imply mere passivity, lack of resistance, or lack of active response to the sex act. Assumptions based on contextual factors (such as clothing, use of alcohol, or dancing) are ungrounded and should not be taken as signs of consent. Although consent does not have to be verbal only, verbal communication is the most reliable way, which implies mutual willingness and respect.

Note that giving consent to a sex act once does not mean that the partner has agreed to be in sexual contact all the time or to move on to other types of acts. For example, agreeing to kiss should not lead to an assumption that the person is also ready to have sex, or having sex once does not mean that the person is ready for it in the future.

You can change your mind at any time

A person can withdraw consent at any time. The best way to do this is telling the partner that they are uncomfortable with what is happening and want it to stop. It is sometimes difficult to withdraw consent verbally, but that does not mean that a non-verbally expressed intention is any less valuable. 

It is important to remember that there are some people who cannot give consent to sexual activity due to being voluntarily or involuntarily under the influence of alcohol, drugs, other substances, or due to being unconscious, asleep or unaware that sexual activity is taking place, or because of being incapacitated due to their age and other reasons. In this case, incapacity is temporary or permanent inability to give consent, to make a decision. In addition to the above, a person can be found to be incapacitated if they do not know where they are, how they got there, why or how they were engaged in sexual activity.

Thus, the following cannot be regarded as consent:

• Refusal to accept the partner’s “no”

• When it was received by the unconscious, unresponsive or visibly upset partner

• Believing that wearing certain clothes, flirting, or kissing is an invitation to a certain action

• If it was given by a person who is under the age of consent established by the state

• If it was obtained from someone who cannot give informed consent due to being under the influence of drugs/poisonous substances, alcohol
• If it was obtained through blackmail, threats or instilling fear
• If sex acts were carried out based on previous experience.

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